Darkness is not a tangible thing. You can’t sweep it under the doormat or take it out in trash bags, we only wish it would be that easy. It’s a mist, lingering in the house of your life, gets stuck in all the corners and is much harder to get rid of than mold. It waits around, swiftly putting together an oversized couch for grief to get even more comfortable. Wet traces of loss still visible on the floor and everywhere piles of unsaid words cluttering the bedroom of your mind.
“You will lose someone you can’t live without,and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn’t seal back up. And you come through. It’s like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly—that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp.”
― Anne Lamott
“I saw the world in black and white instead of the vibrant colours and shades I knew existed.”
― Katie McGarry, Pushing the Limits
“So it’s true, when all is said and done, grief is the price we pay for love.”
― E.A. Bucchianeri, Brushstrokes of a Gadfly
These analog photos were taken in a very dark period of my life when I was dealing with loss and the only way I could face it was through the lens. Last year January won the award for being the worst wonth of the year, and this year decided to show off how great it is at being dreadful. Since the beginning of this year it really felt like we’re all watching destruction and death hand in hand dancing their cruel dance, raging flames around them reminding us how small we are and how quickly our own flames can start flickering and blow out. We should all be reminded that no matter how dark the times may be we all carry light inside all of us. It turns out we are all little bursting stars of the universe.